See you@K's...

This is such a demanding job! I'm on a strict schedule ...
During the day, K eats every 2-3 hrs. Her night-time routine almost runs like a Hindi cinema show -12 to 3, 3 to 6, 6 to 9!

In between these nursing sessions are her diaper changes which is still taking a good 15 mins, from start to finish.
But I should thank K for her co operation. She just knows when its time to go potty...her cue is when the tap goes on & when I switch on her small red musical toy ..its diaper time people- yet again!
She poops & pees every time she eats & then sometimes in between too. & then sometimes, we have accidents! & thats when she gets her mini sponge-baths.
Clean smelling fresh clothes, a new diaper...& a small wait, before the clean becomes dirty!!:))
Aah...I wonder when this 'phase' will come to an end... & I could catch some good sleep.

But the funniest thing is, when she is asleep, I wait for her to wake up...& when she refuses to go to sleep, I pull my hair!

She is smart & naughty. She is a happy baby. & she is very good@ making those distint faces and noises aka communication.
She smiles when she is satified eating. She smiles when she wakes up...
She has a way let me know when she is hungry..the way she looks @ me & begs for food!
She coos when she is getting a diaper change reflecting her happiness...she already knows what clean is!

So henceforth, I am going to update her blog coz now, everythings about her! I had a great pregnancy; the journey was awesome & everythings well 'documented' in here...there's hardly anything new to post.
So over to K's...!

My Sweetie...

...is ONE month old!

Road To Recovery...?

or should it be 'Blame it on Hormones??'
Cant figure out the appropriate title...

Heres what has been happening lately...
~I am cramping every day...
~Am still faithful with my maternity pant & the meshy hospital panty coz they fit comfortably on my tummy...have to wait for a few more days to fit into my 'everyday' clothes...
~I am stressed out...my TMJ hasnt left for a long time...
~I am a Zombie! The last time I slept for a 6-8 hours was before Jan 7th! Getting back to that routine currently looks impossible! I manage to get about an hours sleep between feedings & diaper changes at night which is not possible during the day time coz K likes to be held all the time! & so these days, the urge to take a few sleeping pills is growing stronger!
~The incision site is still numb. Urinating is still a problem. Firstly, I have lost the urge to go & secondly, I have an irritated Urethra - thanks to the catheter.
For my 1st post-partum appnt, I was checked for urinary infection. Thankfully I dont have it! I still have diarrhoea like bowel movements.
~I dont get time to brush my teeth or comb my hair...
~My wrists are getting stronger day by day and I am developing biceps-triceps - whatever!
~I have lost tonnes of weight...am @145lbs now! Thanks to hot flashes and night sweats that I get every night. I am the only one @home who sleeps in only a single layer of clothing. I am "stinky N wet" mom... @least, thats what TD calls me!! I need changes twice a day!
~Enough of you Lochia - its time for you to leave..
~I am thristy 24/7 & hungry than ever!
~Its a month & I havent completely healed ...my enegry levels are like when I was 7-8 months pregnant...I can only work for 2 hours max...esp if it involves driving.
~I snap without a moments notice & otherwise I am sweet as a puppy...
Unfortunately, usually my poor Mom is @ the receiving end...

But above all, I have realized, the only thing in this whole wide world that can make me happy is my sweetie K !
I love looking at her, holding her for hours... I love it the most when she cries out for me....when she stares at me, looks into my eyes, recognises me, knows my touch...& smiles back!

My Birth Story

It all started with contractions, that came around 2am, on the 7th of Jan. They were sporadic & very mild. Then around 7am, a pattern was established; painful contractions, coming once every 6-7 minute.
It was certain by then that I was in true early labor, coz no matter what I did, they wouldn’t go. Slowly there was an increase in the intensity too.
I tried to focus on things like watching TV, listening to music, talking with Mom & DH, BUT nothing would help. I realized, these 'distractions' were actually irritating me. Every time, during a contraction, when my mom & DH tried to pacify me, I would scream on them to stop talking!
DH then clicked some 'final' pictures of me & mom on the staircase. Must I say, I look the worst in them! You can actually see the pain I am going thru, me being indifferent, almost in a trance, my poor mom making all the effort to ease me off my pain!

I then started to deep breath, a technique typically used during active labor; 6 deep breaths in a minute with a cleansing breathe @ the beginning &@ the end.
I ate lunch & took a shower. It was a blessing. I had a coupla contractions they were painless.
Later around 1pm, I called the OB. By now, my contractions had started appearing one in every 5 minutes. OB instructed me to go straight to the hospital. It was time!

The 7 minute car ride from my home to the hospital was hell...I had 3 contractions & hated being on the road, in the car, hated almost everything!

‘Sweet Pea’ was the name of the L&D room...I thought, what’s so ‘sweet’ about labor anyway! Heparin/IV lock on my left hand, maternal fetal monitor on, I changed into the labor gown. The Nurse checked me – I was 80% effaced, 0 dilation @ -1 station. She praised me for the way I was breathing through my contractions.

6 hours later, the Nurse checked me, I was good@ effacement (not completely effaced), but had not dilated. In the meantime, Tweetu was showing decels on the monitor. Her heart rate would drop down and stay there for a good minute after every contraction. The OB thought of inducing my labor. I was given the choice of either Cervidil or Pitocin. Pain medications were also mentioned. I decided on Cervidil after much deliberation. Here’s why.

I had done all the right things. I took my classes, practiced my breathing, had my Dh & Mom(my backup coach) trained in reminding me that everything would be fine. I will have a quick labor & within no time, Tweetu will be with us.
Somehow instinctively, call it ‘maternal’ instincts, since the begining of my contractions, I knew – C section was the only way out. Rather the previous day, I had expressed the same thoughts to both DH & Mom & what if I ask for pain medication?

I was not comfortable with the pain, didn’t know if I could bear the level 10 pains(till then I described my pain @ level 6, as I mentally thought I could bear it all) .Tweetu’s condition wasn’t improving either. I didn’t want to go thro all the pain that induction would bring, only to have a C section @the end. I thought of going ahead with the surgery, & getting done with it.

DH & Mom had a tough time understanding me. In a way I sounded disappointing, even to myself, as I had never dreamt that after all the time spent on knowing the benefits of a vaginal delivery & charting out a birth plan devoid of a C- section, it would be me who would insist on having one! I was so much in pain & was terribly scared of it. It took another OBs visit, Moms & DH’s convincing, that I finally OKed Cervidil.

Cervidil was administered & so was the Foley’s catheter. There after, things, read contractions & pain, started speeding up. I was in active phase. The pain was almost unbearable to me. In between all the drama, my water broke! It stained green confirming the presence of Meconium. But it was moderate. A big towel was pushed in between my legs to soak the amniotic fluid.

Tweetus heart beats were getting recorded intermittently & the graph was not very clear. This had been the case right from the beginning.
The OB came in to attach an internal fetal monitor to my poor baby’s head. I hated this the most. What more, the OB missed attaching it the right way on the first go. She was successful in 2nd attempt. It must have been such a torture for Tweetu…That’s the reason why later I didn’t get a picture clicked with the OB & my baby.

A couple of hours later, I decided to get Epidural. Aware of all the risks & disadvantages, I signed the papers coz I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I think I had reached my threshold & that was a surprise….

The Anesthetic did a very fine job. I had no pain during the procedure except the lightning bolt jolt that went thru my left leg once the medicine was in me. I dared not to look at the equipment & the epidural material that was brought in my room. Mom stayed with me while DH walked the hospital corridor. Later I was hooked on to Oxygen.

I felt my legs go numb & heavy instantaneously. Pain vanished in a matter of minutes. I was relaxed for the first time. A low dose of Pitocin was introduced. Cervidil was kept intact. Next, every two hours, the Nurse came to check my progress. I was going nowhere. Near the end, I had effaced completely but dilated to only 6. Pitocin dosage was increased. At one point, Epidural started wearing off. I could feel a constant rectal pressure which made me push, during every contraction. I knew, if I pushed anymore, my Cervix would give up & start swelling, complicating labor. But the urge to push wouldn’t go. & suddenly, I started shaking vigorsly. I was so cold, it felt like I was sleeping on a block of ice. DH covered me with a coupla blankets, but nothing helped.

Soon the Anesthetic was called. He administered another dose of an analgesic. The Nurse bought in a couple of warm blankets but warned not to cover myself for long. Slowly, I was normal again but was riding a temperature – 101.4; which refused to go down. Now it looked like this was a reaction to an infection. After all, my bag of waters had broken a while ago. Tweetu ran a high risk of contracting the infection. Tylenol was administered anally. At this point, Cervidil was removed with an increased dosage of Pitocin.

Finally, around 5 am, the OB came in and started explaining. I had been in labor for almost 24 hours & it had stalled. Tweetu had been in distress for a while. Per OB, my baby wasn’t in a position to take the level 10 birthing contractions & pushes. She also told us regarding the possibility of the umbilical cord being wrapped around my babie’s neck. I was running a fever & Tweetu had almost caught the infection.
We had no time.

Within minutes I signed the papers, I was prepped up for the surgery. DH was given a robe to wear as he was going to accompany me during the operation. I was shaved, rolled to the gurney & was taken to the OR. Saw my teary eyed Mom wish me the best of luck. I was dazed. I was so calm & relaxed…I was living a present that I had predicted.
I felt no pressure during the surgery. I asked a Nurse to record the time of birth for me.

5:22am & my sweet baby K was born! Weighing 6.15 lbs, @18” – she looked very much a beauty. She spent no time & started looking around , trying to grasp things in the OR with her large jet black eyes.
I saw the happiness & excitement in DH’s eyes. He was called to talk to her to initiate bonding. She was crying, she was happy to be born! Her APGAR@ 1 & 5 minutes were 8 & 9 respectively. She had some breathing problem but once under a heater, she was breathing normally only to conclude that some babies take their own sweet time to get adjusted to the changes in temperature. But lets not forget, it was indeed cold...remember, k-yaa is a january baby! She was kept in the Nursery for the next 4 hours. I met my baby after 2 long hours postpartum, when she was bought in for a couple of minutes to my room. when my bundle was handed to me, all I could think of was how I could take care of such a tiny human being!
My recovery was fast; I walked the hospital corridor the very first day & was discharged on the 3rd.

Today, we took K to her first pediatric appointment. Her doctor was in praises! K has grown! She now stands 19.5” tall and weighs 6.8lbs.
Me & my baby are the best breast feeding team! She recognizes my voice & touch.
My world revolves around her & both of us have become inseparable!